My cheating spouse doesn’t think monogamy is natural

I’ve heard all kinds of excuses husbands will make for having an affair. Sometimes even the husband knows that the excuse is pretty silly. He says it just to have something to say. (And saying anything can feel better than just being silent.) But one of the dumbest excuses out there (at least in my opinion) is the argument that men are simply not made up of nor are they intended to be monogamous. Interestingly, many men only float this theory after being caught cheating. Many never expressed a concern about this when they were dating or considering getting married.

However, when you are faced with cheating or having an affair, this is the excuse some men will give you. A wife might say, “This is the second time I have caught my husband cheating on me. When I first caught him, he swore he would never cheat on me again and I believed him. He went on and begged. So he caught me off guard when he cheated again. The second time, he didn’t regret that much. In fact, he was a little defensive and this time, he tried to defend himself. He said that if you really think objectively, you will have to admit that men and human beings as a species are not destined. to be monogamous. He says that if you look at the mammals in the world, very few mate with a single person for life. My husband maintains that humans are animals at heart and very few animals are monogamous. He says what to ask a man who is monogamous is asking him to go against his own nature. He says that it is unrealistic to ask a man to go through his 70+ year life expectancy and be faithful to one person. Is he right? “

Well, if I had to answer this question, it would just be my opinion. I think if you asked ten different people this question, you could get ten different answers. But I also think you need to answer the question when it comes to yourself and your marriage. No one else’s opinion should matter. What matters is what you think and whether monogamy is important to you in terms of your marriage.

Personally, I believe that because human beings have a different family involvement plus free will, they cannot compare us to other mammals. For other species, the father is not always involved in raising the children. Few other species stay together as part of a family unit like humans do. For this reason, I personally believe that it is important that the heads of that family (the father and mother or both parents) are faithful. That is just my personal opinion. That is just what I want for my own marriage and my own family.

Your husband has presented his theory and belief to you and it is now up to you to agree, debate, or reject that theory. Also, you could see if counseling or self-employment might help you change your mind in the future. Sometimes when people do not understand their behaviors and motivations, they will simply try to find fault with their own “nature.” But this is what happens with human beings. Unlike other mammals, we have free will. We have the brain capacity to think about decisions before making them. We don’t just operate on impulse. We have the ability to listen to reason and to allow ourselves to be influenced by our conscience.

I don’t think you need to make a decision right away, unless you just want to. You can certainly make it clear to your husband that you don’t agree with his theory or that he doesn’t buy it.